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  • September 3rd, 2017


By Joel M. Vance

The news that Steve Bannon has been ousted from the White House, whether voluntarily or by a boot in the butt, is like finding that a great white shark has been patrolling the swimming beach where your kids play.
Bannon has returned to Breitbart News, that cesspool of faux media only matched by the equally noxious septic system, Fox News. Between the two of them they have managed to pollute the profession of journalism, perhaps fatally. No longer can we trust that what we’re hearing especially from those two is anywhere near the truth. When Donald Trump, the fake president, trumpets about” fake news” like an old rogue elephant terrorizing a native village with its blustering bellowing, he should be referring to Breitbart and Fox news, rather than the mainstream media outlets. If anyone knows about fake news, it’s our serial lying, woman groping, deadbeat president.
Bannon left behind at least two proto-Nazis in his wake, in the White House like a rusty old warship trailing garbage and sewage in its wake, so it wasn’t as if all the rats deserted the stinking ship of state. Although one of the Bannon acolytes quickly and frantically did flee the White House, possibly ahead of a posse. Trailing in Bannon’s noxious excrescence was Sebastian Gorka, a clownish figure at best, who famously wore a medal bestowed on him by an neo-Nazi group to Trump’s inauguration. The Exodus from the White House has come to resemble the kind of chaotic, clownish scramble often seen in the old Keystone Kops, comedies of yesteryear.
Gorka’s role in the White House was never clearly defined and it’s possible he was kept around for comic relief, a sort of court jester like Rigoletto. Although, as I remember, Rigoletto was responsible for the death of his own daughter, besides which he sang beautifully. It is possible Gorka will do his own singing to any of the several committees investigating Trump’s ties to Russia and Russia’s interference in the 2016 presidential election. One can only hope. Predictably, Gorka has fled back to Breitbart along with Bannon.
Still slithering through the corridors of the White House is Stephen Miller a senior policy advisor to Trump (read that as pro-Nazi sympathizer.) Miller was mentored by Richard Spencer, a white nationalist who is a poster child for the neo-Nazis and white supremacists. Miller is a former aide to Jeff Sessions, the nation’s attorney general. Here is a quote for you by Spencer, “to be white is to be a striver, a crusader, and Explorer and a conqueror.” If that weren’t blatant enough, Spencer added “America was, until this past generation, a white country, designed for ourselves and our posterity. It is our creation, it is our inheritance, and it belongs to us.”
Give that man and all his devoted followers a white sheet, a cross and a gallon of gasoline with which to ignite it. So you have Richard Spencer, Stephen Miller, and Jeff Sessions, all espousing the kind of hateful rhetoric that defines those who oppose civil rights and common decency. Three men in a tub— too bad we can’t launch them out to sea. The only hope is that Miller will follow Bannon and Gorka, like a Norway rat sniffing on the trail of rotting garbage.
Bannon has the personality of a mob enforcer, the guy who shows up to demand protection money or he’ll break your leg or burn your shop down. He basically has already promised to burn the White House down if the occupants don’t bow to his political demands. He apparently has an enemies list of Trump Associates, a political hit list of those he wants to get rid of and he figures that he can do more damage outside the White House than he could within. I guess he figures that Trump is fully capable of destroying the presidency without his help, possibly the only conclusion he has that I agree with.
Some of the Trump coven has managed to hang on including Kellyanne Conway the wicked witch of the west wing, although you don’t hear much from her anymore. Perhaps she is busy brewing evil potions, with which to poison the body politic. If you see flying monkeys hovering over the White House, it’s time to head for the hills.
Kellyanne did make news of a sort, the only kind of news that she knows how to make, when she was interviewed by Pat Robertson (talk about hypocrisy heaped on hypocrisy) who asked her to describe Donald Trump’s most notable attribute and she replied, “humility.” I couldn’t stop laughing for an hour, a sort of bitter laugh combined with incipient nausea. Kellyanne deserves some sort of medal for unintentional irony.
There has been a parade of spokespersons at the media daily briefing rostrum, attempting to make sense of that which cannot be made sense of. Sean Spicer lurked in the bushes like an escapee from Laugh In, murmuring, “Very interesting!” and furnishing hilarious material for Saturday Night Live skits. Anthony Scaramucci lasted no longer than a hummingbird at a flower. Now we have Sarah Huckabee Sanders, the daughter of one time Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabee, a devout Christian minister and the father of an equally devout Christian daughter, who somehow finds herself capable of defending a serial womanizer, profane serial criminal and when he can find the time to further demoralize the country, pretend to be the president of the United States. How can anyone who trumpets Christianity at the same time defend a person who is so devoutly unChristian as to almost define the term. Talk about hypocrisy.
Our criminal, mentally disturbed president famously said that he could shoot someone in the middle of Fifth Avenue and get away with it. Unfortunately, he probably is right, possibly the only time in his adult life that he has been right. If he is contemplating committing homicide on Fifth Avenue, I have a candidate for him. How about Joe Arpaio, the once, far from great Sheriff of Maricopa County in Arizona. Trump pardoned him even though Sheriff Joe was convicted of a federal crime, and was awaiting sentencing.
Arpaio is a long time butt buddy of Trump’s, and was among the very first to lick his boots when he announced candidacy for the presidency. Arpaio has committed so many insults to the law he allegedly was upholding that it would take a book to list them. To add even more drama to this humorless comedy of errors, Arpaio has announced that he might mount a campaign against Republican senator Jeff Flake who has been critical both of him and his orange flavored mentor, the clown president. How can it get any more ludicrous than this? How do you suppose Huckabee Sanders will cover this fake out. The White House press release explaining the reasoning behind the Arpaio pardon made the brutal Sheriff sound like the reincarnation of Jesus Christ.
After a three-hour quick stop in hurricane ravaged Texas during which the highlight for Trump was to stand on a step ladder and praise a small group of un-enthusiastic unaffected Texans, Trump never mentioned those who have died or been left homeless or otherwise been savaged and ravaged by Hurricane Harvey. But, hey, he has pledged to donate $1 million to hurricane recovery, although the source of the money, whether from him or, as is usually the case, from someone or some organization he can con out of it, is uncertain. I’m hardly waiting with bated breath for him to hand a stack of cash to needy folks in the Houston area out of his own pocket.
On his second visit to Houston four days later, Trump did some of the things he should have done the first time— high five a small boy, kiss a little girl, and hand out food at a disaster shelter. He did, he said, sense a whole lot of love and happiness in Houston. Yeah, it does seem like there would be a lot of love and happiness under 4 or five feet of water.
The Kardashians, hardly the epitome of a functional family, have pledged a half million dollars for relief and Dell technologies billionaire Michael Dell has pledged $36 million. So far Congress, which seems to be on perennial vacation, has not pledged a damn thing, although it’s kind of maybe going to do something.
Trump already has threatened to let the government shut down and default on its debts including money owed to retirees, Medicare recipients and others who rely on government checks. Hardly a person you can rely on to pay his debts. He is one who said that if the economy crashed, “You go back and say, hey guess what, the economy just crashed. I’m going to give you back half.” He also has called himself the king of debt. “Nobody knows that better than me. If things don’t work out, I renegotiate the debt. That’s a smart thing, not a stupid thing.”
So if the poor people of Houston are waiting for Trump to bail them out, they better be able to hold their breath underwater for a long time.

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1 Comment

  1. linda schaeffer

    September 9th, 2017 at 12:23 pm


    What a great column!

    Just learned of this blog from a column by John Winkelman in our local Leader newspaper dated Thursday Sept 7.

    Boy this Joel Vance is right on the mark!

    Thank you for your clarity and truthfulness!

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